“Where Are Your Shoes?” - The Universal Parenting Mantra
If you have kids, there’s a good chance you’ve asked this question so many times you could record it and hit “play” every morning. It’s right up there with “Did you brush your teeth?” and “Stop licking the dog.”
The scene is always the same: It’s five minutes before you need to be out the door. Backpacks? Packed. Snacks? Prepped. Jackets? Zipped. And then - “Where are your shoes?”
Cue the chaos: one child is looking under the couch, another swears they left them right here (on the roof, apparently), and someone is now crying because they can only find the left one.
Why It Happens Every. Single. Time.
- Kids live in a different dimension. Shoes don’t belong in closets — they belong in the fridge, the garden, or under a blanket fort.
- Time is an illusion. What feels like 30 minutes to find shoes is apparently only 15 seconds in “kid time.”
- The great distraction spiral. On the way to get their shoes, they find a toy they haven’t seen in months… and suddenly the mission is forgotten.
The Real Impact
Sure, it’s frustrating—but these micro-chaos moments are part of the mental load parents carry daily. You’re not just managing stuff; you’re managing people who can’t remember where they put their stuff.
How to Survive the Shoe Hunt
- Assign a shoe spot (bonus points if it’s right by the door).
- Do a night-before check - yes, even for shoes.
- Laugh about it later (because in the moment… you might cry).
And next time you ask, “Where are your shoes?” - know that somewhere out there, hundreds of other parents are doing the exact same thing, at the exact same time, with the exact same exasperated sigh.